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Why It's Awesome to Feel Like a Fraud

Feel like a fraudMy sophomore year of college, my roommate dragged me to a psychic fair.

Now I’m a little woo – but a psychic fair was a bit too woo for me back in those days.

Roomie was raving about this psychic she saw. “Life changing,” she said. “Must go,” she said. “Will rock my world,” she said.

Eye roll, I did (when she wasn't looking).

I sat down across from an older woman doing her best Stevie Nicks impression. She took my hand, studied my palm, and she spoke my future:

“You’re going to pursue higher education. I see you getting a Ph.D.”

I thought “I see me getting my money back for this reading.”

I was not the type of girl to get a Ph.D. Heck, I was the first one in my family to make an attempt at college – what a freaking loon this psychic was.

Didn't she know that girls like me didn’t get a Ph.D.? We get jobs, we get married, and we get knocked up. That was my trajectory.

Fast-forward 6 years. The phone rang. A many with a heavy Southern drawl said “Hey Michelle! It’s Dan O’Hair, chair of the Department of Communication. Congrats you’re admitted to the Ph.D. program at the University of Oklahoma. We’d also like to offer you a fellowship.”

As I hung up the phone instead of feeling joyful and proud of the accomplishment. I felt like a fraud. A complete impostor because girls like me didn’t get degrees. And we certainly didn’t get full-ride fellowships.

I was going to get to OU, and they would ALL realize their huge mistake.

If you’re reading and wondering if you’re really as good as they say you are.

Wondering why you landed that speaking gig or got that big client or why anyone would do business with you.

Worried that you’re going to let them all down

Because if they only knew the real you what would they think?

I get you. That’s exactly how I felt (and to be perfectly honest I haven't lost that impostor feeling).

Here’s the thing: feeling like a fraud is awesome.

It’s a sign that we are growing into a bigger version of ourselves.

The version that other people all ready see, but we have not yet accepted.

You got that speaking gig, new client, or that big opportunity because you are an expert. I got into a Ph.D. program because I’m freaking smart and motivated.

You’ve got knowledge or certain je ne sais quoi, that people need.

Growth is uncomfortable. It’s too easy to tell yourself, I’m not good enough, I’m not smart enough or I’m not ready enough.

But other people already think you are. Scratch that – other people know you are.

Let’s give that inner impostor a big bear hug and kick in the butt out the door.

Here’s what I want you to do to stop feeling like the fraud:

Set a time for 2 minutes (lookie google has a timer waiting for you).

Write down 5 reasons why you’re the expert. Why you’re so darn awesome. Why people need the knowledge and experience that only you possess.

Work fast. If the inner critic starts rearing his ugly head, you have my permission to yell “Shut it inner critic. I’m not listening.” Then stick out your tongue and blow raspberries at that stupid critic.

Once you’ve got those 5 reasons you’re awesome. I want you to take the bold, audacious action to make it public.

Tweet it to me:

Hey @Michelle_Mazur I’m awesome because….

When you start owning that bigger version of yourself, declaring it out loud to the world, you’ll feel less like a fraud and an impostor.

You’re awesome. You’re ready to step into the bigger version of yourself. I can’t wait to hear all about.

As for me, I started believing in psychics and men with thick southern accents because they see something in me that I don’t see in myself.

Xo,

Michelle

P.S. I sometimes write these post more for me than for you.

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4 responses to “Why It's Awesome to Feel Like a Fraud”

  1. VANESSA SEXTON says:

    Love this!!! I love your posts. Next time your inner critic starts that crap tune out your “I Suck Solo” and tune into the truth. 🙂

  2. Diana Matthews says:

    This is fantastic! Thanks for this post! 🙂

    • Michelle_Mazur says:

      You’re welcome! I wrote it for myself but I’m glad it’s helping others.

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